Stuck at career and no love

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stefan_gee
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Aug 21, 2019 10:41 pm
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Stuck at career and no love

Post by stefan_gee »

Hello all.

I feel so stuck at my career. The income isn't so bad but it's not really enough. Also, I failed to get promotion multiple times, and recently, I should get it (already approved from local department), but due sudden change from higher office, my promotion get cancelled. I am thinking to change job but because of some circumstance, I cannot resign till early March 2020. Will my career get better here or should I try looking for new job? And favourable time to switch job maybe?

I also have problem with my love life. I'm still single since I was born. And I often feel lonely. When will I meet someone and get married? Also if possible, what kind of person is she?

I am male,
Dob: 30 May 1989
Time: 10.10 AM local time (GMT +7)
Place: Yogyakarta, Indonesia

Thanks in advance.
admin
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Joined: Thu Jan 01, 1970 10:00 am
Location: Australia
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Re: Stuck at career and no love

Post by admin »

Hi stefan_gee,

Yes, I see you surely have been going through a very difficult and frustrating period for some time now.

You are currently going through your ‘Saturn Return’ – a period we all experience around the age of 30 – and one that marks the end of one cycle and the beginning of another in our growth and maturity. This ‘Saturn Return’ has been very relevant to your work/career matters, not least of all as you have Saturn in your 6th House of ‘work’. Added to this, the heavy influence of the planet Pluto has been in opposition to your Mars in emotional (and defensive) Cancer in your 12th House. This may have resulted in a fear of confrontation, perhaps stemming from being bullied somewhere in your early life. I would suspect that the difficulties you've had in this recent work situation which created a lot of inner tension and building resentment which needs/has needed an outlet if it’s not to either erupt in some outburst of anger, or draw antagonism and resentment from others; or at worst, turn inwards and become self-destructive and/or result in depression.

Don’t worry though. This is drawing to an end and if you’re able to see how this has been working within you, this will enable the radical inner changes you are and have been going through to become very productive rather than destructive. Surely you’ll be a changed person by the time Pluto fully leaves this opposition - again during these next few months - even though you might not fully understand all that has been going on at this very deep level for quite a while. But in the meantime, this energy needs to be channelled outwardly in some way, such as in a sporting activity, or some other active and energetic physical exercise like... hiking out in that beautiful countryside around you there.

I’m sorry but I can’t predict when you will marry, nor what kind of person she might be. However, I would suggest that you might be looking for an ‘ideal’ rather than a ‘person’ which makes it hard for you to ‘get attached’. Also you need to be aware that even though you have all that Gemini charm, you may come across as too needy or too intense when you meet someone you are strongly attracted too, especially currently or during these past few years. Also, I think you can be easily hurt, and this can give an underlying fear that inhibits you and prevents you showing your true feelings or trusting your feelings to another which can result in your giving off mixed signals.

However, as Jupiter (expansion/growth) is currently going through your 5th House (love/romance, amongst many other things such as – indeed – an appreciation of wide vistas that lift you out of and above the ‘daily grind’), I would suspect that you might well relax and open up more to relationships as this year progresses, especially as Jupiter will oppose your Venus in Gemini from around mid-October. Just don’t go overboard and expect too much. Simply...enjoy !

Hope this helps.

Best,
Admin.
"Don't let the illusions of your past or future rob you of the infiniteness of your present." [Unknown]
stefan_gee
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Aug 21, 2019 10:41 pm
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Re: Stuck at career and no love

Post by stefan_gee »

Hi admin,

Thanks for your explanation. Yeah there are already some burst of anger, though I try to limit them so that only my supervisor knows the problem. And to other team member, I just look like having bad mood and quieter than usual, but if someone talking or asking something to me, I answer as I usually do. And sometimes I took a walk for 1 or 2 hour to clear my head and prevent outburst. Unfortunately I'm not sure if I can spare special time for sport or exercise. I really hope that it would be better soon. Is it possible to know that it's going to be better to stay or find a new job?

Honestly, I'm not sure about my 'charm', and I really not think of myself as a charming person. I usually feel a bit tense and nervous even when just talking to a woman, especially the one I'm attracted to. I'll try to enjoy more. Hopefully my luck will be better.
admin
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Re: Stuck at career and no love

Post by admin »

Hi stefan_gee,

I apologise for missing that part of the question. (Actually, I had addressed that matter in my draft reply, but in the process my computer ‘blue-screened’ and I hadn’t noticed that my comments about this had disappeared).

You had mentioned that you can’t resign until early March 2020 and so, looking at it from that point of view, I feel that things will improve where you are during these next few months, especially as it looks like you’ll be taking on more responsibility where you are working - hence the potential of that promotion you are seeking which is indicated as a possibility Oct./Nov. Why this looks likely too, is that it appears your work-load may increase considerably. You’ll need to keep doing those long walks to refresh you and clear your head in order to cope with this potentially increased work-load.

It is also possible that in Feb. other work opportunities may arise, perhaps from somewhere you don’t expect. You will need to be careful though as during next year, you may become very changeable so it might be a good idea not to sign contracts next year that commit you to one course/job for any lengthy periods...if you can possibly avoid doing so. Don’t panic about this though. Just be aware of what you’re signing.

Re the relationship matter and your tenseness and nervousness “especially the one you’re attracted to”, well that’s a difficult issue to overcome, I know. Self-consciousness naturally interferes and immediately blocks communication, and communication is after all, the corner-stone of relating.

It would be best if you could talk to a therapist about this problem, but if such isn’t available for you, then it might help if, when you’re attracted to someone, you ask them questions about themselves, and then (most importantly)...listen to their answers and respond to what they say. If you show and feel genuine interest in someone, this will go a long way towards forgetting yourself and your hang-ups – and everyone loves it when someone is really interested in them and in what they think. Maybe make a list of things to ask – though don’t make it sound like a list when you’re talking of course. LISTENING is an art, though once you’ve got the hang of it, it will come naturally and then you’ll find your self-consciousness and tension disappearing.

Perhaps too you are looking in the ‘wrong place’ for a relationship, or meeting them in a ‘closed’ environment. Maybe you can invite someone you like on one of your walks or excursions for example so that you have other things around you to talk about, as this will take the focus outside of your self. Or perhaps if you involve yourself in some group or other so that you’re not in a full ‘one-on-one’ situation with someone you are attracted too, at least until you get to know them better and feel more comfortable with them.

I do hope that some of this helps in some way.

Best,
Admin.
(Please see my ‘pm’ to you).
"Don't let the illusions of your past or future rob you of the infiniteness of your present." [Unknown]
stefan_gee
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Aug 21, 2019 10:41 pm
Contact:

Re: Stuck at career and no love

Post by stefan_gee »

Hello admin,

Thank you very very much for your answer and advice. I do really hope that things will be better soon. My project deadline will be around november too, so eventually there will be more workload that time. But I surely fine if a.promotion came along too. :lol: :lol: Guess we'll see what will happen in next few month. And yes, I do plan to continue my walking behavior if I need to. It's really helpful to reduce the stress. As for next year, I will carefully to consider my options and try to see it from as many angle as I can.

About my nervousness, a therapist seems not an available choice right now. Basically, I'm a quiet and shy person. And as I understand this can be a problem to get into a relationship, I've try to improve for some times though it's slow improvement. Well at least now I can talk to a girl casually, if I don't have feeling for her. Before, even talking to any girl seems scary. And yes, my environment is a bit limited. Mostly my friend come from my working place, and then after work, I go home and help my parents, so I don't have many chances to expand my environment. But I'll try to do it, cause it will give me more chances, right? :D :D

Once again thank you very very much for your help. Surely I'll check your pm.
anandmalhotra
Posts: 160
Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2019 2:39 am
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Re: Stuck at career and no love

Post by anandmalhotra »

stefan_gee wrote: Thu Aug 22, 2019 12:51 pm Hello all.

I feel so stuck at my career. The income isn't so bad but it's not really enough. Also, I failed to get promotion multiple times, and recently, I should get it (already approved from local department), but due sudden change from higher office, my promotion get cancelled. I am thinking to change job but because of some circumstance, I cannot resign till early March 2020. Will my career get better here or should I try looking for new job? And favourable time to switch job maybe?

I also have problem with my love life. I'm still single since I was born. And I often feel lonely. When will I meet someone and get married? Also if possible, what kind of person is she?

I am male,
Dob: 30 May 1989
Time: 10.10 AM local time (GMT +7)
Place: Yogyakarta, Indonesia

Thanks in advance.
2022 is the time for you... for Career and love marriage after approval from mom.
Drink milk,curd white dress, these may help keeping mind calm...
God Bless...
God Bless All.
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stefan_gee
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Aug 21, 2019 10:41 pm
Contact:

Re: Stuck at career and no love

Post by stefan_gee »

anandmalhotra wrote: Mon Aug 26, 2019 8:16 am 2022 is the time for you... for Career and love marriage after approval from mom.
Drink milk,curd white dress, these may help keeping mind calm...
God Bless...
Hello anandmalhotra
Thanks for your insight. Any chance you can tell me what kind of person she is? :D :D
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